Saturday 1 March

India has monsoons, Texas has hurricanes, Alaska has blizzards… and they all turned up on Saturday for the 84th Interport at Yamate. YCAC fielded a team with eight different nationalities, but no Frenchmen (no surprise there. When it comes to the big battle, the French are always on the sidelines).
The first exchanges were fast and furious, but some YCAC players had made special preparations. Cuddly Rob Evans’ blubber-building program soon paid off. Unaffected by the extreme cold, he shepherded Nick Humphries over. Yoshi Amano had clearly been filming a new water sports link for his website: cruising through the oppo defence at will. Rob “No Pubes” Grant seemed to be on fire when he stormed over the line with Terry Brink in close support. Nick Humphries raced over for an absolutely phenomenal second try before leaving the field to recuperate. Half Time: YCAC 15 – KRAC 6
After the manly heroics of the first half, the half time break was a shameful affair. Jimmy “Just-Call-Me-Anorexic” Rogers was screaming at the ref: “No half time, no half time!!”. Rob “No Pubes” Grant was Nelson-esque in pleading “Hold me, hold me, I’m cold.”. Fortunately, no Frenchmen on hand to take him up on that one. When the ref announced that scrums would become uncontested for safety reasons Richard “Goatee” Hoskin yelled “****ing uncontested. The only time that I’m warm is when we’re scrummaging” and promptly announced that he would not be returning for the second half. In spite of the wimpish nature of the half time outbursts, the YCAC boys girded their loins and yet again took the game by the scruff of the neck. Paddy Maloney and Go Ito scored fine tries with Rob “Cuddles” Evans managing two conversions . The only second half concern came when it appeared that one of the Japanese guys playing for KRAC had broken the line-out codes. After a call of “220 Frankie”, he looked up at the YCAC No 8 and asked “Are you Frankie?”. The Man of the Match Award went to Terry “I-Never-Got-Chilblains-Playing-on-the-Feld-With-the-Gazelles” Brink. Congratulations to Ryota “If-Wasn’t-the-Referee-I-Would-Have-Smacked-Garlo” Yashima for being the first ex-player to referee an Interport and Erich “Just-Call-Me-Mr.-Big” Friess whose captaincy inspired wins in all the big games this season: Interport, Keio and Crusaders (twice). Final Score: 29-11

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